I recently stumbled upon the book Financial Feminist by Tori Dunlap. I would recommend anybody who is interested about money to invest in a copy of her book. Ms. Dunlap had a lot of good insights and scripts to offer. What I found most interesting is how stressful it can be for people to negotiate their salary or raises. Women especially seem to suffer anxiety about asking for something that they in essence deserve. I’ve seen this in my clients numerous times. Let’s try to reframe the perceptions around negotiating with a company.
1. Looking at the company, as a company and not family
Who hasn’t heard of organizations using the family metaphor to describe themselves and the workplace? It’s a marketing ploy that tries to create an emotional attachment for you to the company. I can’t say this more clearly but a corporation is not your family or similar to a family environment. It is a company that wants to make a profit by any mean possible. And if they pay you less that means they make more of a profit. In addition, if an employer is not doing financially well, they will not think twice about laying you off. So don’t believe the hype.
2. Your raise shouldn’t be tied to your company doing poorly financially.
If you’re company had a low profit year, does that mean that you didn’t perform your job? No. You did what you were paid to do if not more, so what is the reason you would be okay taking a less than ideal raise? You’re not doing yourself any favors by accepting a low raise because more than likely, someone else has asked for more and are now receiving it at your expense. If a company was really transparent, they would show the amount their Executive Board received in raises and bonuses.
3. Negotiating a raise should be a collaborative experience.
It may feel like you’re going into battle when you’re asking for a raise but viewing it that way makes it stressful and anxiety inducing. When you ask for a raise, it’s about what have you done the previous year to add value to the company. Corporations aren’t going to deny that you’ve done your job if you’ve done your job. They even expect there to be some negotiation but they are more than happy if you settle for what they offer. That is why you’ve got to be prepared. Do your market research on your position’s salary, write up your contributions and present it to them. It will be less stressful the more prepared you are to negotiate.
In the end, what’s the worst that can happen? The organization says no. Then you decide if you want to stay there or look for a better opportunity where your contributions will be acknowledged, appreciated and valued. But what happens if they say yes? You won’t know until to do it.
Judy Wang, LCPC, CPC provides telehealth services in NV and MD. She works with teens and adults who are struggling with OCD, anxiety and trauma.